Funny Ar Eyou From Tennesse Jokjes
My friends are real jerks. I was excited to text that I landed a full scholarship to the Southern Tennessee Forensics University
And they all wrote back STFU.
Dear Abby
My name is Gloria Mae and I'm from Tennessee. I'm 14 years old and am still a virgin.
Is my brother gay?
Pentagon Contract
A contractor arrives home from Washington, D.C. and proudly tells his wife that he's gotten the contract to fix a cracked walkway into the Pentagon.
Two other contractors showed up to bid on the job, he explained to her. One was from Minnesota, the other from Tennessee. All three of us went to the Pentagon with an official to examine the cracked walkway.
The Minnesota contractor took out a tape measure, did some measuring, then worked some figures with a pencil.
'Well,' he said, 'I can do the job for about $9,000: $4,000 for materials, $4,000 for my crew, and $1,000 for me.'
The Pentagon official told him to write up his bid and send it in for consideration.
The Tennessee contractor then did the same, measuring and figuring, and then he said, 'I can do this job for $7,000. $3,000 for materials, $3,000 for my crew, and $1,000 for me.'
The Pentagon official told him to write up his bid and send it in for consideration.
I didn't measure anything. I just pulled the Pentagon official aside and whispered, I can do the job for $27,000.
The official was incredulous and said, 'You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such an incredibly high figure?'
I whispered, '$10,000 for you, $10, 000 for me, and we hire the guy from Tennessee to fix the walkway.
What has 3 teeth and 100 legs
An unemployment line in Tennessee.
If a man and a woman get married in Tennessee then move to Texas and get divorced…
Are they still brother and sister?
What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkensaw.
If you marry a woman in Tennessee, but divorce her in Kentucky...
... is she still your sister?
Tennessee Joke
Two guys are hunting in the woods one day and they get to arguing about a set of tracks they had spotted, "Them is deer tracks," one says. The other, "No them's bear tracks!" Back and forth for about an hour... Then they get hit by the train.
A man in Tennessee was arrested for attempting to have sex with an ATM.
Even worse, he received a penalty for early withdrawal.
Are you from Tennessee?
Because you look like an inbred redneck.
Hey girl are you from Tennessee?
Because I was wondering if you'd still be interested in me if I wasn't your cousin
You can explore tennessee reintarnation reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean tennessee tornado dad jokes. There are also tennessee puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Two Flordia football players have been suspended for Saturday's game vs. Tennessee for refusing to take a urine test...
I guess you might say urine or your out.
FAA study of black boxes found in domestic US, fatal, small airplane crashes shows 98% say "may day"
remaining 2% are pilots from Tennessee who say, "hey good buddy, hold my beer and watch this"
You know what's better than Tennessee?
Elevennessee.
Why do black people prefer Hennessey to Jack Daniel's?
Hennessey isn't made in Lynchburg, Tennessee.
What do MLK, Elvis, and the Houston Oilers have in common?
They all died in Tennessee
A man from Tennessee takes his daughter to the doctor and tells the doctor his daughter need birth control.
The doctor asks, "How old is she?"
He replies, "15."
"And she's sexually active," the doctor asks.
The man replies, "Naw, she just lays there like her mother."
Hey girl, are you from Tennessee?
Because you're on fire right now.
Hey girl, are you from Tennessee?
'Cause you are on fire! (sorry)
Anyone wanna road trip to Tennessee?
I hear Gatlinburg is pretty lit
Anyone hear my hot new mixtape?
I dropped it down in Tennessee.
Hey baby, are you from Tennessee?
Cause you look extremely inbred
My mom, who lives in Tennessee, always complains to me about all the chiggers there.
I was not aware there were any black Chinese.
Most people in Tennessee don't think climate change is real..
But it's not really an educated opinion. Think about it, most labs here have the word meth in front of it.
Serena Williams' nickname should be...
Tennessee Williams
How are a Texas Tornado and a Tennessee Divorce the same?
Someone's going to loose a trailer
What did Tennessee?
Same thing Arkansas
How are tornados and a Tennessee divorce alike?
In either one, someone's going to lose a trailer home.
Hey girl, are you from Tennessee?
Because your teeth are missing.
Hey girl, are you from Tennessee?
Cause you look like your parents were siblings.
Why are murders so hard to solve in Tennessee?
Because there are no dental records and the DNA is all the same.
What do hurricanes and a Tennessee divorce have in common?
Someone's gonna lose a trailer.
Why is a toothbrush called a TOOTHbrush and not a TEETHbrush?
It was invented in Tennessee
Why are some types of silverware so difficult to find in Tennessee?
Well since everyone there spoons, nobody's family tree has a fork.
When I was young man I met a girl in Tennessee turned out she was a moonshiners daughter. That was a long time ago..
But I love her still.
Hey are you from Tennessee?
Because you have a very strong accent.
Some people don't know which American state puns are terrible, and which ones good.
I Tennessee the difference, though.
What's so great about being in Tennessee today?
I'm seeing triple
Are you possibly perfect and named after a southern state today?
Because you're Tentatively the only 10/10 I see, Tennessee
Tennessee man accused of dipping testicles in customers salsa.
I'm sure Jerry Lee Lewis wrote a song about that.
There's a reason they call it "March Madness".
A Duke fan, a Kentucky fan, and a Tennessee fan are climbing a mountain and arguing about who loves their team the most.
The Tennessee fan insists that he is the most loyal and then yells This is for the Vols! and jumps off the mountain.
Not to be outdone, the UK fan next professes his love for his team. He screams This is for the Cats! and pushes the Duke fan off the mountain.
If the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags," and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs," then...
what does that make the Tennessee Titans?
What do a tornado and a Tennessee divorce have in common?
Someone's going to lose a mobile home
Was driving through downtown Pigeon Forge and dropped this one…
So Pigeon Forge, Tennessee (US), is a HUGE tourist trap. We're talking zip lines, roller coasters, Ripley's Believe it or Not museum, Ferris wheels, life sized King Kong, etc.
Anywhoo, I was driving the family through this insanity when my wife pointed out a building to the kids and said look at that one with all the giraffes on top! I wonder what that is! Without missing a beat I said, Welcome, to Giraffic Park! And hummed the theme song while navigating through a left hand turn. I was proud and laughed out loud at my own joke. My 7 year old loved it.
Source: https://jokojokes.com/tennessee-jokes.html
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